525,600 minutes

Before I delve into my newest addition to my Tokio Hotel collection, I want to take a few minutes and try to describe this journey. It won't be enough. I can never find the words I need. Though I've been told I'm a skilled writer (which I don't believe), I always feel like the perfect order is just beyond my grasp. Hence why I don't believe those who say I'm good at this.

But that's not what I'm writing about. I want to talk about Tokio Hotel. About this last year and three months. Or is it four months now? I can hardly believe how time has flown; I can hardly believe the difference in me. To go from a depressed, jaded high school drop-out who'd long since given up on dreams, to where I am now. And maybe others don't see the difference; I don't know. People don't tell me stuff. But I gave up on giving up, and I owe it to Tokio Hotel.

That night, just over a year ago, when I saw that picture on that stupid website, I didn't have any idea that my life was about to be turned on end. I couldn't get that picture out of my head. And when I searched on Google, I found a video which also wouldn't let me be. That boy was so enthralling, so enchanting. He was like a Tale'edras or an Elf out of one of my favorite fantasy books. Now I do a little drawing; I don't pretend to be anywhere near good. But if I could have created the perfect image of what I find most beautiful in a human, it probably would have looked something like Bill Kaulitz.

Now let me get this straight before we go any further. I do NOT find him attractive. I find him beautiful. There's a huge difference. He is beautiful, inspiring, amazing, the closest thing to perfect any human could hope to attain. But he is not attractive to me in the least. I don't worship him, I don't think he's sexy, I just find him an amazing and inspiring role model.

When I watched "Don't Jump," I found myself falling for this odd German band. I wasn't exactly well versed on pop culture. Growing up, I was taught that Britney Spears was the epitome of evil, and that nothing good could come out of Hollywood. I admit, I try to keep up with modern, current entertainment now because I hate being so clueless about the culture I grew up in. However, I never in a million years would have thought to look outside North America to find what I was looking for. It wasn't that I was opposed to European musicians, I honestly just hadn't thought of it. So I was surprised when I fell so hard. I think part of it- make that most of it- was due to my utter boredem. Sitting up all night, waiting for something to happen- the world is never as boring as it is at 02:00 when you're alone. And so I listened to Tokio Hotel music videos, watched old THTV episodes, and eventually found THA.

I say eventually; it was probably less than a week.

The changes have been significant.

In 2006, I left the Bible college in Chicago.

Between 2006 and 2009, I did nothing.

In 2009, I got a job.

In 2009, I saw "Don't Jump."

In 2010, I got my high school diploma, enrolled in college, was accepted into the Honors Program, started learning German, decided to go after the major I wanted instead of the one I thought I should do, signed up for three music classes, including piano, and finished my first semester of college with a 3.7 GPA.

All that to say:

This has been the best 525,600 minutes of my life.